Midnight Musings - Walking Dust

I woke up...

I dont know where I was.

I started looking around me.

I was sitting near a fire on a beach.

It was night and looked like it was about to rain.

I could feel...

Escaping Embers & Crackling Fire

Humming Waves & Cricket Noise

Approaching Storm & Thundering Clouds

Fading Stars & Cool breezes

It was all pleasant & beautiful...

I stood up and started walking, with a torch.

I turned back and could see my footprints.

They were eventually erased by the waves.

I was walking towards a dark forest.

I could see monkeys restlessly shrieking,

Even in the stormy and dark night.

What could be more restless than these?

Probably my mind, because it's restless even when I`m asleep.

I found a large cave and entered it.

It started raining heavily just after that.

There were all sorts of scrambled pictures & fuzzy stories,

Carved onto the wall of that cave.

Some of those felt familiar.

Some of those were old & fading away.

I thought that the cave can only endure ones that are deeply carved.

Just like my memories that are strongly etched into my heart.

I suddenly heard a sound, I looked around.

I felt something hit my ankle.

With the help of the torch, I tried to see what it was.

It was a snake, and I realized, It bit me.

I just stood there shocked. I gradually collapsed.

But I didn't feel any pain. Instead, I felt high and I realized couldn't move.

I was completely immersed in that state.

Surprisingly I wanted it to last for some more time.

I was becoming sleepy and about to go unconscious.

In those moments I thought why didn't I do anything after I got bit.

Maybe I was stumped out by an altered state so much, I was ignorant.

Just like one sinking in desire and realizing it only at the very end.

Suddenly I felt... nothing.

It was like I was... dead.

I could not see, hear or feel anything.

Where am I? What I have become? What I was before this?

Then there was a light & I understood I was that light.

In that light I realized. I was previously just a Walking Dust.

And now I'm just dust.

And there is no need to walk again If I understood this.

And then I really woke up... from my dream. It all was just a dream.

Was it a nightmare or a good dream? I wondered!.

And it was neither of them.

I realized It was just a glance of truth.

I'm just Walking Dust, awake or in a dream.

Comments

The Purpose

The sun was just about to set. I reached just then. I got down from the car and walked to the river. I kneeled down and put my hand in the water. The water in the river had a little warmth because it was a sunny day. I sat down there, waving my hand for some time. It was so good, I hoped the time stopped then and there. Then I thought, my hand was feeling the experience of water. Irrespective of which part of the river I put my hand in, the experience will remain mostly stay the same. If I enter the river and swim, then my experience would become more vivid and significant. If I submerge myself completely underwater then the experience of water around me becomes everything. Hypothetically, just imagine because of my sheer desire to stay there I obtain the ability to breathe and live underwater. I would probably choose to explore further rather than swim back to the surface. I will start imitating any creature I would find living in that water. Slowly I will learn a movement of my own

Who am I?

I'm the shadow behind what is expressible. I'm the core of what can never be expressed. I'm the one inside the darkness. I'm also the one in its absence. I dwell in depths of silence. I'm the ruler of the hall of sounds. I'm the cause behind every intention. I'm the force behind every action. I'm the offering. I'm the receiver of the offering. I'm the one who is called in every chant. I'm the blessing. I'm the one who is bestowing blessing. I'm also the one who is getting the blessing. I'm the water, fire, air, matter, space. I`m the one causing time. I'm the one beyond time. I'm the dream. I'm the one dreaming. I'm also the one free from the dream. I'm an integral part of every form. I'm also formless. I'm the witness. I'm the one being witnessed. There isn't anything, anywhere, anytime that is not me.

Beyond Words

The yearning, The desire. It's hard to tell if it is a selfless pursuit or a selfish endeavor. I never understood the great emotion being confined to a few words. Sometimes it's just the pleasantness of the union. Sometimes it's the pain of separation. Every other emotion feels like a by-product of that. It devolves into something evil the moment it's not about people but things. In its presence, all things sweet don't feel the same always. And all sad things don't stay the same. When it is understood deeply, pleasure will never be in taking, but in giving. It is what gives comfort even inside a prison of our own making. It is the warmth in one's association. It is also the warmth of one's tears flowing down on their cheeks on farewell. Is there somewhere that it isn't there. I don't need to celebrate it particularly if I cherish it every day in one form or another. What it symbolizes neither changes for anyone nor anything. It is misinterpret

Sharanagatam

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